


In this world, there's only you

by Pichitinha



Series: What If [4]
Category: To All the Boys I've Loved Before (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, Not Beta Read, Romance, Teen Angst, What-If, and from peter's pov actually, another scene rewrite, this is completely movie based
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-15
Updated: 2020-07-15
Packaged: 2021-03-05 01:13:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,872
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25275967
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pichitinha/pseuds/Pichitinha
Summary: What ifPeter heard Lara Jean talking to Josh in the school hallway."What were you and Sanderson talking about?" he decides to ask even though he feels bad for omitting the truth.She shrugs. "Nothing important."The rest of the walk to the car is quiet and Peter's heart beats faster every second, wondering what she had meant, why she'd said that, why she isn't telling him, what to do now.
Relationships: Peter Kavinsky/Lara Jean Song-Covey
Series: What If [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1786567
Comments: 14
Kudos: 200





	In this world, there's only you

**Author's Note:**

> hi again people! so this is another take on a movie scene where i change some details and see where we get with it. it's peter's pov because i don't think i could have written it properly through lj's eyes. you'll identify two direct quotes from the movies which i did not use italics on because they're in the middle of the fic, sorry about that. once again i'm making this a series but the stories are not connected, they are changed situations from the movie and due to cause and effect they obviously can't be a continuation of one another.
> 
> title is from the song [numbers](https://open.spotify.com/track/1bDLMtY69Cx6inNN9kaYkk?si=jqlZ3FdxTuW4XDkzciNcOw) by **the cab** , give it a listen

Peter thinks it's a miracle that the teacher lets him go to the bathroom so close to the end of class, but she must have thought he was sick - he knows his face is scrunched over and she probably interpreted it as him feeling unwell. He's still pissed about the talk with Gen at the bleachers and he hasn't been able to concentrate since, especially because he couldn't find Lara Jean afterwards anywhere.

Because that's the thing, now Lara Jean is actually the first person on his mind when he needs to breathe and calm down, being near her  _ helps _ him. Something eases off his chest when they're together.

Because he likes her. In a way that you're supposed to feel about your real girlfriend, not your fake one.

He'd started all of this with Gen in mind, maybe not even to get her back exactly but to affect her somehow, to show that he's not her lap dog, but now that he and Lara Jean spend all this time together, he forgets Gen even exists most of the time.

He's been thinking over how to approach this with her for days, but it's an unusual situation that he's not really prepared for. Especially with Lara Jean, who is so guarded and so full of romantic dreams.

He's thinking about the ski trip - no adults, no little siblings, no nothing to get in the way of him letting her know how he feels.

And then Gen comes and throws this on him: she'll be there and she'll be single. And that changes nothing on what he feels, but he knows she'll be gawking at him the entire time. He can't have Gen ruining this for him. For Lara Jean.

He's in the bathroom for too long and when he looks at the time he knows he won't be able to get back to class before it's over, so he splashes his face with some water to calm down and decides to walk to Lara Jean's classroom to wait for her by the door so he can't miss her.

When he walks out of the bathroom, though, he sees her walking with Sanderson and they disappear into the corridor to the right.

An unpleasant feeling that feels a lot like jealousy settles on his stomach. Like he needed that on top of everything on this stupid day. He walks over with purpose to see what's going on.

When he gets closer, though, he can hear her voice, and at the sound of his name he stops on his tracks, two steps short of actually turning the corner and being seen.

"-don't wanna hear about Peter stuff, but I guess I needed to talk to someone I thought might understand. I just feel like the more used to him I get, the more it's gonna hurt when he inevitably gets back with Gen, and I'm so mad at myself because I should've seen this coming."

Peter's entire body freezes where he's standing.

_ What? _

Sanderson takes a few seconds before he replies and his voice is flat, to Peter it sounds like the undertone is  _ I told you so _ . "Nah, I'm good. I don't know what to tell you, that sucks. I'm sorry."

He knows he shouldn't eavesdrop but he doesn't move because he needs to hear more, but the bell rings just then and the halls start filling up with students.

He gives it a few seconds before he turns the corner and they're still there, standing quiet.

"Hey," he greets them trying to sound normal even though he could not be farther from it. Despite what he just heard the jealousy monster is still on his chest so he drapes an arm around Lara Jean's shoulder, and he can't help but notice how she doesn't move closer to him as usual. "How you doing, man?" he asks Sanderson who's eyeing him with a dirty look.

"Good, thanks man." He sounds as forced as Peter had when asking. "Listen, I gotta go, catch you later LJ. Good luck with..." And he eyes Peter quickly, but he notices it. It's judgy. "Everything."

"Thanks. Bye, Josh."

"Ready to go?" he asks and she nods, but she's still tense. "You okay?"

She looks away before replying so he can't fully see her face. "Yeah, I'm just tired."

He bites down on his lip because he wants to talk to her about what he heard, but he doesn't want to tell her that he overheard, the last thing he needs is for her to think he was spying on her.

"What were you and Sanderson talking about?" he decides to ask even though he feels bad for omitting the truth.

She shrugs. "Nothing important."

The rest of the walk to the car is quiet and Peter's heart beats faster every second, wondering what she had meant, why she'd said that, why she isn't telling him,  _ what to do now _ .

When they're safely inside his jeep, he decides to come clean. Knowing the truth and fixing whatever is happening between him and Lara Jean is more important than letting her know he eavesdropped on her.

"Lara Jean, listen. I know I shouldn't have, and it was sort of an accident, but I heard what you said to Sanderson. I'm sorry."

She freezes on the passenger seat, eyes wide but looking forward instead of him.

"Oh."

He waits to see if she'll say more, but she seems frozen still, nervous.

"I just wanted-"

"It's okay," she cuts him off. "Two for two, I guess, because I was having lunch with Chris under the bleachers today when you went there with Gen. So I heard your conversation, too."

Well, fuck. Great.

"Covey, that-"

"It's okay," she says again, and this time her voice breaks, as if it's anything but okay. She's still not looking at him but he can see she's forcing her expression to stay bland. His heart hammers strongly in his chest because it feels like they're close to the exact opposite of what he wants. "Guess we both got what we wanted out of this. We had a good run."

“What? No-”

She has her hand on the door handle before he can even process it, her face turning away from him. “Glad you figured things out with Gen.” And then she’s jumping out and closing the door and he’s still staring at it with his mouth hanging open like a fish.

It takes way too many seconds for him to recover and leap out as well, she’s already a good feet away but he catches her before she even makes it out of the parking lot.

Lots of students are staring, certain that drama will unfold.

“Lara Jean, wait!” He holds onto her arm and she looks surprised that he’s followed her - she also looks heartbroken.

He is seriously the biggest idiot on the planet. He's been waiting for the perfect moment, the best way to tell her, when he could have done something about it ages ago and they could be  _ fine _ .

Looking at Lara Jean right now and seeing how disappointed she looks, how sad she sounded when she told Sanderon that he’d inevitably get back with Gen, how defeated she was when she talked about the bleachers - it's so clear he's waited too long.

He’s finally ready to admit it but somehow he has already screwed it up.

“What?” she asks, still crestfallen and confused, as if she truly doesn’t get why he went after her.

As if she really believes that he’s getting back together with Gen and that he’s done with her.

He looks around and everyone is walking slowly around them, like vultures waiting for the latest gossip.

Lara Jean deserves better.

“Come back to the car, let me drive you home. I wanna talk to you.”

She knits her eyebrows. “What about?”

“Covey, please?”

She looks around and sees everyone staring, so she bites her lips and nods, following him back to his jeep.

He starts driving as soon as they’re both inside with fastened seat belts, fleeing from the prying eyes still on them.

Lara Jean is looking straight ahead, stiff as a board.

“I’m not-” He knows what he wants her to know, but he doesn’t know how to say it. “I’m not getting back together with Gen.”

From the edge of his eyes he can see her nodding very slightly. “Yeah, you’re waiting for the ski trip.”

“No-” he tries, but she’s not done and doesn’t even hear him.

“That’s when she said she’ll be single, right?”

“She did, but-”

“I don’t think we need to keep doing this until then, Peter, she’s obviously interested. I’m sure if you asked now she’d break up with him anyway.”

“Covey-”

“So, yeah, it all worked out. Good for you. And me, obviously, Josh is no longer on my back. So-”

“Lara Jean, will you stop?” His voice comes out louder than he planned but it does the job at getting her attention. She finally looks at him, seems a bit shocked. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to yell. Just- will you just listen for one second?”

She visibly gulps and looks straight ahead again. “Okay.”

They are getting closer to her house and he’s running out of time.

“What you said to Sanderson-”

“It’s my problem, not yours,” she interrupts him, shoulders tensing up and cheeks reddening.

He's growing more and more frustrated. “I thought you said you’d listen.”

She looks abashed. “Right. Go on.”

“I’m not getting back together with Gen. Not now, not on the ski trip, not ever.”

She blinks a few times and looks at him from the corner of her eyes, confused. “What do you mean?”

“I mean I’m not dating Gen again. Not sure how I can be clearer than this.”

He can see that she's having to make an effort to not look at him now. “I don’t understand.”

They are just a couple streets away from her house so he just stops the car right then, because he can’t risk her running off as soon as they arrive.

“I don’t want to be with Gen anymore.”

Lara Jean finally turns to look at him, questioningly. “Why not?”

“Because I don’t like her anymore.” He takes a deep breath and holds her gaze. “Because I like  _ you _ .”

It takes a few seconds but she chuckles humorlessly, almost bitter, and turns away again. “Very funny.”

Suddenly he’s the one that’s confused. “Wh-”

“ _ You can’t keep doing this to me, Gen _ ,” she says in a mocking tone. “ _ You have a boyfriend _ ,” she adds. “Yeah, that really sounds like you’re over her.”

“Now, Covey-”

“Thank you for the ride, I can walk the rest of the way.” And then she’s unfastening her seat belt and opening the door, and he manages to catch her before she exits this time, but she just yanks her arm and leaves anyway.

This time it only takes him half a second to follow, and with his long legs he’s in front of her before she can even notice.

“Can you stop being so stubborn?”

She huffs in annoyance at his large figure blocking her way and crosses her arms. “I’m not being stubborn. You asked me to fake date to get Gen back and you did. Congratulations! Now let me go.”

“And you said yes just to get Sanderson off you back and now you have feelings for me-”

She chuckles that horrible bitter laugh again, interrupting him. “Is that it? Are you amused that you got me to like you, too?”

“ _ Don’t _ , Lara Jean,” he warns, starting to get mad. “You know me better than that.”

She visibly deflates at his, shoulders slumping. “You’re right, I’m sorry. But either way-” She bites her lip and looks down, deflecting from him. “You’re just confused, Peter. It’s Gen. Everyone knows it’s always gonna be Gen.”

His heart breaks at how dejected she sounds.

He reaches into his pocket and picks up his phone, unlocking it and opening his messages.

“Here.” He offers her the device and she just stares confusedly at it on his hand.

“What?”

“Look at my messages. See when’s the last time I talked to her. See how many texts I send  _ you _ .”

“Peter-”

He pushes the phone into her hands. “Just  _ look _ .”

She takes it and slowly clicks on the screen. He can’t see what she’s doing but he’s not afraid, he’s got nothing to hide, he would actually love it if she saw how often his friends talk about how they like her and how he always agrees that she’s incredible.

“Look at my phone calls, too. Look at everything, I don’t care.”

“I-”

“I really like you, Lara Jean.” He takes a step closer and her breath hitches. “Why is it so hard for you to believe it?”

She finally looks at him and he can’t help but softly touch her hair. He can see the goosebumps on her skin. “You know how I feel about letting people in.”

“Am I not already in?” he asks and he can see he catches her off-guard. “You know me, Covey. Would I lie about this? Would I be this cruel to you?”

She’s quiet for a second but then she shakes her head and whispers, “No.”

He moves the hand that’s caressing her hair to the back of her neck and with his thumb he can feel her heart beating way too fast.

“If you want me to go, I’ll go. I’ll drive you home in silence, let you go in, and that’s it. But I would really like it if you let me kiss you right now and give me a chance.”

They just look at each other for several moments, the only movement between them being his thumb caressing her pulse point. And then, finally, instead of replying she reaches out to him and breaks the distance herself, touching her lips to his tentatively. He smiles against her mouth and kisses her lightly, doesn’t want to overwhelm her when he knows this is completely out of her comfort zone.

She looks dazed when they part and he can’t stop smiling.

“Can I assume you’re giving me that chance?”

She chuckles, this time finally a good one. She nods but sighs worriedly. “This is all new to me.”

He nods as well. “I know. We’ll go slow. I’m with you no matter what.”

“What does this mean? For us?”

He shrugs and tries not to laugh because he knows she’s still scared. “What do you want it to be?”

She touches his face. “You first.”

“I want this to be real.” He doesn't even have to think of the words. "I want you to be my girlfriend and I want to erase the word fake from my dictionary."

She laughs, for real, and whatever weight was on his chest finally eases off. He kisses her again, brief but strong, and he loves the little happy sigh that escapes her lips when they part.

"Sounds good. I'm gonna draft a new contract."

He snorts. "Yeah?"

"I'm getting rid of the no-kissing clause for this one."

"Good, I hate that clause. Keep the hand in the back pocket thing, though, I'm not ashamed to admit I was wrong and that rocks."

She giggles and he does too, can't help himself when so many things happened so fast but everything finally fell into place. He drops his hand so he can hold hers and she marvels at their intertwined fingers for a second before letting him walk her back to his car and open the door for her.

He drives the little distance that they had between them and her house trying very hard to focus on the road and not at her, but it's hard when she's so very clearly trying to hide a smile.

"This is real, right?" she asks him when he parks, earnest eyes on his own.

He holds her hand over the console and leans in. "It is. I promise."

"Okay."

He smiles and kisses her forehead. "Can I come in? Lots of movies to watch and I'm hoping now you'll let me cuddle you."

She laughs and nods enthusiastically. "Yeah, absolutely."

"So, this new contract." He asks as they walk to her door, his arm over shoulder. "Parties are still included, right?"

She rolls her eyes and gets her keys. "Yeah, yeah. Ski trip is up for debate, though."

"Lara Jean, you'd better be joking right now."

She laughs and closes the door behind them. "I am. I can't let Gen make a move on you so soon after all this."

He shrugs and pulls her close. "Gen who?"

She laughs but he swallows it with his lips, a longer and harder kiss than the previous ones. They're both out of breath when they part and she looks so content his heart soars.

He holds her cheeks between his hands and pecks her one more time, trying to put as much honesty in his voice as he can.

"Believe me, Covey. There's no one like you."

When she hugs his waist and buries her face on his chest, he knows she believes it.

**Author's Note:**

> so in my mind (and i'm assuming most if not all of your minds as well) by this point peter already knows he likes her and is planning something for the ski trip - i don't think the korean snacks were a last minute thought and that's why he was so adamant that she had to go. so yeah, that was born out of that bc i love a good eavesdropping plot (sue me). as usual if you liked this please do click the kudos button and consider leaving me a comment as they are the fuel to my brain's motor. you can find me on tumblr as [pichitinha](https://pichitinha.tumblr.com/), and you can find all of my other covinsky stories by [clicking here](https://archiveofourown.org/works?utf8=%E2%9C%93&commit=Sort+and+Filter&work_search%5Bsort_column%5D=revised_at&include_work_search%5Brelationship_ids%5D%5B%5D=25514001&work_search%5Bother_tag_names%5D=&work_search%5Bexcluded_tag_names%5D=&work_search%5Bcrossover%5D=&work_search%5Bcomplete%5D=&work_search%5Bwords_from%5D=&work_search%5Bwords_to%5D=&work_search%5Bdate_from%5D=&work_search%5Bdate_to%5D=&work_search%5Bquery%5D=&work_search%5Blanguage_id%5D=&user_id=Pichitinha).


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